One Way Love

[Chalk up another post under "better safe than sorry," as once again the song is recorded by Simon-as-Landis but the authorship is "unknown."]

"I love you/ Why don't you love me too?" Is this not a heading under which we can safely place a third or more of all songs, altogether? This answer-less question, so often asked, is the basis for much of poetry as well, and trying to come up with yet another poetic way to ask it begs the question-- what's wrong with just coming out and asking it?

The expression "one-way" brings to mind the traffic sign, and our speaker does not disappoint:
"We have hearts that never meet/ Mine goes down a one-way street/ Aching with the lonely beat/
Of one way love."

The subject, in case it is at all unclear, is unrequited love: "For your kisses, how I yearn/ But you never will return/ My one-way love."

The speaker has standards-- "Love should be a dream for two," Faced with his predicament, he has several options. One is to seek revenge. One is to pine forever. And there are dozens more.

But this time, a surprisingly mature tack is taken: "You don't care, so I decided/ I must break away from you."

Since she doesn't care, who is he telling? Himself. He is asserting himself, to himself, to reinforce himself.

He has had what some psychologists call "an attack of dignity." He has come to the conclusion that he is deserving of affection and, since this person won't provide it, he has the right-- the duty-- to seek it elsewhere. "There must be/ A true love meant for me," he declares, adding confidently, "I can find her if I try."

How will he know he has succeeded? Simple-- it will be a two-way street: "She will care as much as I."

And then? "Then my heart can say good-bye/ To one way love."

For a teenager, this is a remarkably mature work, on a psychological level. Faced with an unreturned affection, many teens would not have the presence of mind or self-worth to simply mourn and move on? How many songs do we have about "one-way love" that turn into a dead-end street? Isn't the Heartbreak Hotel  itself "down at the end of Lonely Street?"

Love should not be "one-sided," the speaker says. So, he leaves his one-way street and heads down another road. And if this one also leads nowhere... there are always still more roads.


Next Song: Dori Anne

Little Doll Face

[Note: according to some liner notes I saw after this was posted, the song's writer is "unknown."]

There is a Saturday Night Live routine called "Shy Ronny." Andy Samberg plays this character, who is voluble enough to freestyle rap... except when in the presence of Rihanna. Then, he is struck dumb by the power of her beauty, so she thinks he is just dumb.

This scenario, of being made speechless by the presence of an overwhelming radiance, has been part of human experience for a long time. Here, Simon-as-Landis explores the phenomenon from Shy Ronny's standpoint.

The speaker is despondent, as the girl with the "Darling little doll face"-- we know that she has "freckles," and "lashes" that "flutter," but no more of her appearance-- won't even "look at" him. Of course, this is because she doesn't "even know" him.

Of course, he doesn't know her, either. To her, he's a non-entity. To him, she's not much more... just a pretty face that may as well be on a doll.

Some might say this is sexist objectification, and in a way it is. He does see her as an object, a toy at that. But it's simply a reflection of the fact that he does not know her yet as a person... still, he wants to. He does not wish to only see her this way, but for now, her visage is all he has. Well, that and a high opinion of her personality-- "You're lots of sugar, and some spice."

Yes, this nursery-rhyme reference is in keeping with the "doll" metaphor. In fact, it sounds like there is a toy piano on the track.

Mostly, we know that he is not going to get to know her. His objectification of her has made her, in his mind, unapproachable: "Whenever you walk near me/ I'm hypnotized completely... If you'd speak, I'm sure I'd stutter."

He is entirely convinced that he is deserving of her lack-of-notice, and that she is way out of his league. "You're Little Miss Paradise," he tells her, and you can't get more unobtainable than Eden or Heaven. He is sure that she was "born in this world to entice," but be out of reach, like some sort of mythical siren.

"How can I ever tell you/ How much I love you," he moans. He can't, but that is fine because he doesn't love her. He loves her face, and the idea of her, but he doesn't know her well enough to love her.

Until the speaker is able to see her not as a doll, but as a person, she will remain nothing more than an ideal and an idea.

Jim Henson, of Muppet fame, once said, "The only thing between me and my goals is me." This guy needs to start seeing himself as good enough, and her as approachable... and human. Not a doll or angel or statue on a pedestal.

Next Song: Let Me Steal Your Heart Away

I Wish I Weren't in Love

This one recalls 1959's "A Teenager in Love," both in style and sentiment, with a touch of Everly Brothers country-pop thrown in... plus a dash of flamenco in the bridge. It really presages the kind of within-one-song genre-switching that became Simon's trademark.

The opening lines could not be more straightforward: "I've got a problem/ The girl I love doesn't love me at all." Yes, another unrequited-love song.

The speaker, like another song says, got it bad, and that ain't good: "I can't do my homework/ I write her name on my notebook all night." It should be noted that these are very long lines, metrically, for a pop song.

"I'm so unhappy/ Guess I am the loneliest boy in this world," he continues, and who hasn't been there? "I wish I weren't in love," he concludes.

Now, is she stringing him along? Hardly. His love object is crystal clear in her lack of interest: "In fact, she won't even answer my call." Perhaps she finds a teenager who starts sentences with "in fact" somewhat... un-hip?

Rather than simply forget her, our hero paints himself as the victim: "The way she treats me, it just isn't right... How can I make her stop hurting me?" When, in fact, she is not hurting him at all. She is not doing anything to him! Yes, this is a problem for him... but it's not, objectively speaking, her fault.

Again, if she were being ambiguous, his complaint would have merit. But she is not. She is as plain in her disregard for him as a stone wall. Perhaps he feels that his ardor is so great it at least deserves her saying outright that he should, ahem, bug off, or stop calling, at least. She refuses to even acknowledge his existence with a verbal rejection.

The relationship, to the degree that it exists at all, is only in his mind. What this young man needs is for his friends to point out that his efforts and affections are wasted here-- and that he should, until they find a more receptive recipient, maybe do his homework.

If he gets good enough grades, he might get into college... where he might, in fact, meet a co-ed who will answer the phone for a guy who starts sentences with "in fact."

Next Song: Motorcycle

(Pretty Baby) Don't Say Goodbye

This song is usually titled simply "Don't Say Goodbye," but in rare cases "(Pretty Baby) Don't Say Goodbye."

This is a rollicking number that, with different instrumentation, could work well as a country tune.

The speaker is either doggedly optimistic or massively deluded. He makes many protestations of love to his beloved-- and all we learn about her is that he finds her "pretty"-- but it seems she does not return his affections.

He begs her not to leave, pleading, "You'll make me cry if you say goodbye/ Don't leave me, honey, 'til the day I die/ Pretty baby, don't say goodbye," and "Don't let your love pass us by."

He assures her that his affections are deep: "I'm in love with you" and even "I'm so in love with you." In fact, he would even marry her, if she would only return his ardor: "Please, pretty baby, won't you love me true?/ I'm gonna hold you tight till you say 'I do'."

However, it seems his affections are doomed to lie unrequited. It's not just that she's interested in someone else, but more that she's interested in anyone else: "I love to call you on the telephone/ But when I call, I see you're not alone."

I recently watched the classic Italian film The Bicycle Thief. In it, a "wise woman" counsels a man in a similar predicament: "Go plow another field."  Our speaker would be well to follow this timeless advice.

Next Song: True or False